Looking Back...

Yesterday was the last day of Freshmen Orientation for the class of 2015 here at ASU. Since I had been working with Orientation all summer, I finally decided to go to their opening session just to see what it was all about. It was while I was sitting in the back dismissing the sign that says "No food or drink in the auditorium" and eating some Bojangles and listening to the Dean of Student Development and the Director of Student Conduct talk about discovering who you are and making college the best it can be, these thoughts of my college orientation all came flooding back to me. I could tell that there was this energy in the air as students were eagerly anticipating their next chapter in life: college. The thoughts of who they would become, the people they would meet, the classes they would take, I'm certain were frequent among many students. However, I'm certain the thoughts of what type of fun can I have, or what kind of trouble can I get away with, may have been more common than the previous inquiries. But being so far removed from that time in my life, it caused me to take a step back, reflect on what it was like for me and attempt to place myself back into their shoes.

When I went to orientation prior to my Freshmen year, it was the first time I actually saw the college I was going to be attending in just a few short weeks after. The first person I met was my crazy advisor who ended up being my professor for multiple courses I took throughout my career. Since I had enrolled in a private Christian college, he immediately took to quizzing me on the number of books in the Bible and asking all of these ridiculous questions which really caused me to doubt all I had learned during my VBS years. (If you're curious it's 66 total books.) I think that encounter left me so traumatized that the only things I remember after that point was awkwardly talking to some other students at lunch and finally figuring out just how much this private school was going to cost...thus doing the math, figuring out how much in loans I would be paying back... for the rest of my life!

While I really don't remember the details, I remember that eager anticipation of being on the brink of a new chapter in life. The unknown was exciting and scary as hell at the same time. But soon I was moving to a new place, onto a new adventure and had every opportunity to redefine who I was. I can only imagine that this auditorium full of future ASU students were now experiencing a similar feeling that I did back then.

Now looking back on my college years, I want to encourage all those students, and everyone else for that matter with this little nugget of wisdom: Don't just wait until the start of a new chapter in your life to redefine yourself or make it better than what it was before. Go after it with everything you have everyday you are given! In all areas of your life take chances, learn from your mistakes, and have some fun along the way!

Best of luck class of 2015! Go Mountaineers!

Ramblings of an Insomniac

I am horrible at sleeping. Really. Truly horrible. It doesn't make my top five talents list. Or even the top twenty talents list for that matter. And it's not just at night when I can't sleep, it's anytime, anywhere. I'm the person who stares at the people sleeping on planes because I'm so jealous they are gifted enough to fall asleep. I attempt to produce sleep by taking sleep aids. Except while other normal people would experience the benefits of such elixirs and fall into a deep slumber, I on the other hand, lay awake feeling as though my body has been hit by a Mack truck and looking like a hot mess, a drugged hot mess! Not cool.

In all honesty, I guess I am what you would call a "night person". But this goes beyond my preference for time of day. This is an issue. Night after night I find myself laying in bed, exhausted but unable to sleep. It could be related to the fact that my brain never shuts down and my mind is constantly bombarded with ceaseless thoughts! I'm just constantly thinking, thinking, thinking. Sometimes about the most peculiar things!

However, during my moments of insomnia is when I usually come up with my best ideas for papers, presentations, and speeches. It also seems to be the time when I remember more items that need to be added to my To-Do list. And if I put my inability to sleep to use, I can actually get a lot done during the wee morning hours. Which is now probably why I sleep with my computer in bed each night. Pathetic party of one!

But until I some how develop a sudden talent for sleeping, I guess it's back to the traditional methods of curing my insomnia. Bring on the sheep.

Sweet Dreams!

I'll be seeing you...

I didn't want this time to come. I have actually been dreading it for quite some time now. But it's that time when I have to say goodbye to some of the most amazing people I know: The Carruth family. (Insert MAJOR sad face)

For those of you who don't know Andrew and Leigh, you're missing out! Andrew just graduated from the College Student Development program here at ASU and he and his wife Leigh and their little daughter Rorey adopted me into their family this year. From the very beginning of my graduate career, they would invite me up to their cabin for dinner or to watch endless episodes of The Big Bang Theory. Whenever I needed them and even in the times when I didn't think I needed them, they were always there. They hardly knew me but still showed me love and kindness I am not deserving of. As the year continued, they have stood by me through every situation - good or bad. They provided me with a shoulder to cry on, at times a bed to sleep on and the encouragement I needed to get through this past year. I never could have survived with out them!

Now they are off on their next adventure and chapter of life. And I would be lying if I said I wasn't sad to see them go. I'm not usually the type of person who really misses people, but one thing I know for sure is that I will miss Andrew and Leigh dearly!

Andrew and Leigh, I write this to you cause I know you'll read it. THANK YOU! For absolutely everything! I wish there was something I could do to show you just how much you mean to me and how thankful I am for your friendship. You two are so incredible and I am a better person for knowing you both. I'll be expecting to get a phone call from you the day Peanut starts talking. And you better believe that I am going to come visit every chance I get!

So this isn't goodbye cause I refuse to say goodbye to you...plus we'll have our family reunions to look forward to each year. So for now, I'll just say "I'll be seeing you..."

Love you both so much!

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave and impossible to forget."

Concert Time!

For being the music lover I am, I hardly go to any shows. I think the most recent show I went to was hearing John Mayer in downtown Chicago on the 4th of July back in 2007.  Yikes! Major band geek fail. BUT...I am ending such an era in my life by going to Asheville, NC see Mumford and Sons in concert this week!

I'm so excited to see them live! Finally getting away from the mountain for a few hours is going to be pretty great too. And hopefully in just a couple weeks I'll head back to Asheville to see Adele. Bring on the music!

Girl with Gumption

There are those times in life when one realizes that there are certain things about them that need to be improved. Certain strengths or skills that need a little refining. Bad habits that need to be broken. Teeth need whitening, tummy needs tightening, muscles need toning. Let's face it...we all could use a little work.

Lately, by way of sudden change and conversations with friends, I have come to realize that an area I need some improvement on is my level of gumption (which is currently nonexistent...or so I am told).What is gumption you say? If you consulted Webster you would learn that the word means: enterprise; initiative - plus a smattering of other terms that have no significance to this blog-post so I will withhold them for the time being. Some may also call it courage. In my everyday language, what it means is that I need to develop a spine. Plain and simple. 

I think if you had asked me prior to these enlightening conversations, I would have claimed to be a woman of great gumption! Someone who could speak her mind. Stand up for myself! And never would I allow myself to get pushed around, walked on, or be treated in any other way than what I deserve... But for those of you who know me, you're rolling your eyes and saying "nice try, Jacki." Truth is I can be that person in my car or in my apartment by myself, and definitely within my thought process, but never out loud. I would like to place most of the blame on the whole "Minnesota Nice" theory that I was raised in and clearly live out now even though I have been away from MN for nearly a year. Whatever the case may be, this is the current area of my life that needs some tweaking. Now just to figure out how to go about doing that. As for now, I take my inspiration from a scene from one of my favorite flicks The Holiday!

Sigh...

Someday, that day could be quite a long ways off if we are being serious, but someday I will be able to be that bold, be able to stand up for myself and be that courageous. Someday...you will know me as the girl with gumption! Better get to work!