Tuesday, July 12, 2011

The song in my head...

"So baby I'm alright with just a kiss goodnight."
Sing it Lady A!

Gotta Have Faith

I have a lot of questions. I just do. It's kind of how I tick. I am an internal processor and I am constantly working things out in my mind.  By the time I get the answer to one question, I have already thought of two more. It's a never ending cycle really. As of late, I have been having a lot of questions about my faith. Now for those of you who just read the last sentence and are suddenly fearful for my soul...cool it. This is the whole reason I left MN and Youthworks was to get out of the Christian bubble I have lived in for 8 years and to really see how my faith played out in my life. Faith in that setting for me was automatic and at times robotic. So taking a step away from that has given me a chance to see how my faith would flourish or flounder.

The transition away from that bubble...has been interesting. I feel as though I am still in the process of weaning myself off my previous environment and starting to see how I can live out my faith apart from it. Or that I am stuck in some middle vector of some psychosocial development theory of faith. I'm stripping away what I knew before, reexamining things and really trying to figure out who I am as a believer and how I want to identify as one.

I feel like within what we call "Christianity" there is such a broad range and spectrum of faith. Faiths are acted out in such various and sometimes polar ways. On one end you can have the Bible thumping, legalistic, my way or the highway, do it wrong and you will and should be damned sort of belief. And at the other end you can have the faith of a child who asks you to pray for Justin Bieber at nighttime prayer and doesn't bat an eye at it.

With such varying degrees, it leaves me with yet another question: where do I fit in?